1000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By…Erik Schuman

Real quick. Before I start this entry, two things to say:

• Before the NFL Playoffs began, I posted who I thought would win every game and so far, I picked every game right and that will conclude later today when the Green Bay Packers beat the Tennessee Titans and win SB LVI – just like I said they would. I know this will happen since I am perfect and never make mistakes.

• When the NFL added an extra week to the regular season it meant the amount of time between the “Big Game” and Valentine’s Day got even shorter. It used to be it was around a week, or so. Now V-day is the day after the “Big Game.” This means guys have less-than 24 hours to massively overpay for roses and chocolate for their wife or girlfriend. Or in some cases – both. They have to do this to make up for the fact they ignored her from before Labor Day to almost Valentine’s Day because that is how long the College/Pro Football seasons last. For most guys there is an inverse correlation between how long they have been with their girl and how much she really needs to receive chocolate (When you post a snide comment below just don’t use foul language – tell me to “F OFF” using other words.)

Today is Sunday, February 13, 2022. I posted this entry today for a reason. I have told this before but will do it again: It has been exactly 1000 days since my mother, brother and sister and I went to see Dr. Minh Nguyen to get the results of a scan I had taken a few days earlier, after my third (of six) 5-day visits to Hoag Hospital for my chemo treatments. Dr. Nguyen was hopeful that all of my Stage 4 Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma was gone. I was not as sure. I still felt some pain in the back of my right leg (he said it was scar tissue – and of course – he was right). I was hoping for anything over 50% since I had three more visits to go. I hoped Dr. Nguyen was right but anything over 50% would mean the chances were good the last three would get rid of it.

I remember sitting in the chair surrounded by my family when he entered the room. When he said the scan showed no sign of cancer and it was all gone, I really don’t remember much of what he said after that. I didn’t know whether to cry or laugh. I did neither. I was too stunned to do anything, but thankfully my family members were not, and they congratulated me with the joy and enthusiasm normally associated with winning the lottery. Which, in a sense, I did. This is a pic of the good doctor. For the last 4 years I have done the game clock for all University HS basketball games. Dr. Ngyuen's daughters attend school there and play on the team. This was taken at a Woodbridge at University game:

It is hard to believe I have been CANCER FREE for 1000 days. I’m not sure if it is harder to believe I had Cancer or that I have been in remission for that long. It is easy to believe I had Cancer when I look back at pix I took during that time. Pictures of me without any hair and 40-pounds lighter, looking as gaunt and skeletal as a human can get. The picture below was taken 364 days apart. The one on the left was taken July 25, 2019, two days after my last Chemo session. I am 155 pounds. Maybe. The right on July 23, 2020. One year after my last Chemo session. I have hair and about 30 pounds back on my body and no longer need a crutch to walk or keep me upright.

Being a cancer survivor is like being an addict. You will always be one until the day you die. I have many friends who are alcoholics. They will be an alcoholic for as long as they are breathing. For them success is not measured in weeks, months, years, or decades. It is measured in DAYS! All an alcoholic wants to do is get thru TODAY without a drink. They will worry about being alcohol-free TOMORROW! Their goal is day-by-day. Of the friends who are alcoholics their success has been amazing. Some are 20+ years. Some not as long, but once again, all that matters is that if they have been free of alcohol for 10-years and 30-days to have a chance to be alcohol free for 10-years and 31-days. Then 10-years and 32-days. Then…………..and because what they have done is so noble, I want them to get the public attention and kudos they have earned: Eric Moss, Tim Neilsen and J. Bernard Halprin. I know I have left some out and for those I apologize for not giving you the congrats you have earned.

It is the same way for anyone who has experienced a traumatic experience. When Kobe and Gianna Bryant tragically died in that helicopter crash, Vanessa Bryant only made it through the loss of her husband and daughter by having friends around her at all times to be a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen to and to be there to “pick her off the ground” when she didn’t have the strength to stand on her own. The same is true of the other 7 who also died that day.

I knew my family would be there to help. I had a feeling some of my very closest friends would be there to help. I HAD NO IDEA HOW MANY OTHER PEOPLE WERE THERE FOR ME! I was BLOWN AWAY by people I had not heard from in 30+ years contacting me via Facebook or other ways to express their support for me. When people are diagnosed with cancer, they can go about it one of two ways. They can be public and vocal about it or keep it mostly private. I chose to make it as public as I could. One of my HS classmates, Kelly Duncan (Joiner) chose the other way – not letting many people know. But she saw one of my posts and reached out to me. We played a lot of “phone tag” and kept hoping to speak but never did and never will since she died of breast cancer on June 23, 2019.

My family put a large part of their lives on hold for 6 months to help me beat cancer. Those who know me know I have no trouble opening my mouth and expressing my thoughts. Sometimes it is best if I shut up but that is not how I operate, and it never will be. Except during my “Nightmare Journey from Hell!” I am unable to put into words my true gratitude for all they did during this time. I have 9 other members of my immediate family. All of them were very vocal and supportive and were always calling/texting to see how I was doing. The one thing I regret through all of this is something I did but had no control over. Chemo saved my life. But chemo “messes” with your mind in ways that are impossible to describe. During my whole ordeal I had no control over my body functions. I was like a newborn. I would be somewhere and suddenly, I had to poop. Sorry for being graphic but I had no control over that. It was because of that I was hesitant to walk the dog because I knew this would come about. I would make sure I walked Velvet myself at times and if I needed to discreetly did it at the park, making sure to clean it up. Chemo makes you irritable and emotional. I can’t even begin to count the number of times I called my parents “M-fers” or “A**holes.” I look back on it and am truly ashamed about it. But thankfully they knew that even though it came from my mouth I had no control over what I was saying.

I had numerous friends who wanted to come see me – some in the hospital and some when I came home. Only one friend saw me in the hospital and that was on the first visit because I had no idea what things would be like and thought it would be OK for him to see me. I soon found out I did not have enough strength and energy to have anyone visit me at Hoag or for the first week after I got home. Once I got home it took a good 3-5 days to get all of the chemo out of me. I had to sleep 16 hours a day so no time to see anyone but once that week was done – I was glad to see visitors. The only exception I made was after my 4^th (Of 6) visits when long time CSUF friends Stephen Weissbart and Kim (Svoboda) Antoniou wanted to see me. Kim lives near Phoenix and was only in town for a short amount of time so a few days after I got home, I let them come over but slept almost entirely before-and-after they showed up as the pic might how. I couldn’t say “No” to Kim since her awesome mother knitted me some caps and the Broncos blanket you see here.

Here are some of the pictures of people who came to see me:

This first one is of my Uncle Earl. A retired Doctor. When I first got diagnosed we ran everything by him. This pic was taken on Friday, February 22, 2019 after I was released from Hoag when they found the cancer. This same day I had an appointment with Dr. Nguyen and Uncle Earl down from Portland for the day to be with me when I saw him. I am speechless by this gesture:

We have known Melissa/Layne Cogan since the early 90s when Melissa and my sister Kathy were roomies at San Diego State. They drove up from San Diego to see me.

Julie Carr was the first one to come over, doing so on April 22. She was the first one to get the "Velvet treatment."


The last ones to come over were lonnnnnnnnnnng time friends from CSUF days: Hank Tran and Roger Tawara along with not-as-long but valued the same Norm Bergstorm and Nathan Kunishige. We spent the night on the patio eating and talking and it felt great especially since I just got over a bout with food poisoning before they arrived:
***For some unknown reason I was not able to put their pictures here - they are at the very bottom. No clue why!***

The one thing everyone who came over had in common was I knew when they were approaching the front door. Velvet has a chair she sleeps on that overlooks the street and anyone walking up to the door. When she sees someone she does not know she barks loud enough to be heard on Mars. Every single person who came to see me was “greeted” by Velvet’s loud yapping. Until we opened the door to them, and Velvet went out to sniff them, found out they were good people and then cuddled up next to them on the couch. Right Kim and Julie Carr!? Velvet was also one of the main things I looked forward to seeing when I got home after my visits. When I got home you could usually smell me before you saw me because I could not bathe while there because I had IV tubes in my arms. I did some cleaning with soap and water, but it was not the same. When I came home all I wanted to do was change clothes and go to bed (I could not shower until the next day because the spot on my arm for the PICC line needed 24 hours to close. Yet I spent time petting Velvet before going to bed – and I loved it! As you can see, falling in love with Velvet is easy to do! First pic is her looking out and second is when given a bone - which she does not eat but buries in the backyard!

Coming home was not fun for my first few visits. I had to sleep on a futon for many months because I could not lift my leg high enough to get into bed. When I came home it took a good 5 minutes to be able to lift my right leg into bed. And once there I was helpless. I would get into bed and have to have Mom or Dad place the covers over my body. And I was always cold. In the hospital all I could wear was underwear so even when the weather was warm my room had to be insufferably hot because even that was, I was cold. My first few days home after veery visit I had pee bottles by my bed – something I had at Hoag. We have all seen what they look like. I was lucky to go more than a few hours without using one. One time on my first night home I used all 4 bottles and filled them pretty good then needed to use another one – but I did not have one. While in bed I had dreams every day that involved running – something I could not do. I would walk up numerous times a night in a cold sweat because of it.

Being a “Cancer Survivor” is a “badge of honor” those of us who are one are proud to display. Officially I have one brother and one sister. They are twins born a little over 3 years after me.

Unofficially I have MILLIONS of “brothers and sisters” because every single person who is a cancer survivor is a brother or sister to me. They can be 40 years older or younger than me, but we are still siblings. My political thoughts are well-known to those who know me. This is not the place to get into it but even those politicians I cannot stand I wouldn’t wish cancer on them because I know the HELL I went thru is not something I would wish them to experience. When I hear of someone dying from something I beat it makes me both sad and guilty. I am sad because I know what they went through and the pain their friends and family went through and are going through. It makes me feel guilty and almost a “survivor’s remorse” knowing I beat something they could not.

Mary Kay Letourneau made headlines in 1997 when it was revealed she raped a 13-year-old boy, who was one of her students – despite the fact she was married at the time. She served a short prison sentence then hooked up with the kid again and served a longer time. She also had two kids with him. What she did was rotten and awful. But when she died of cancer on July 6, 2020, I was sad because, even though what she did was disgusting, I don’t want to see anyone died of cancer.

I hate Rush Limbaugh. I hate every-single-thing about him. When he died of cancer on February 17, 2021, I was CRUSHED! I was happy what came out of his ignorant pie hole would be silenced forever but crushed it only came about because of his passing. As much as I hate him I would rather have him on air doing his thing than being silenced by cancer.

My Twitter handle is related to beating cancer. On Twitter I allow anyone to send me a direct message. A few weeks ago, a woman sent me the following message. I replied to her and told her if she or her husband needs someone to talk to, I am there to do it as often as needed. I have no idea who she is, but I gave her my number and told her not to hesitate to call me. Nothing yet but if they do, I will be there for them like others were for me.

Like all of America and the planet, I was brought to tears by what happened in early June 2021, on the TV show “America’s Got Talent.” I have never seen the show but see clips every so often. On this particular episode, Simon Cowell did something that endeared himself to everyone by hitting the “Golden Buzzer” and sending “Nightbirde” straight to Hollywood as we see here:

It was a great moment. Jane Marczewski captivated everyone with her story. Sadly, what has happened since is anything but good news. Sad. But, sadly, not shocking. Marczewski has not posted anything on her social media accounts since a brief one on January 15. There is a reason for it. I hate to be “Debbie Downer” but the reason is (And this is only my guess but having “been there/done there” I feel I am right) her health has gotten worse. Much worse. I fear that we will soon get an update on her situation. One that will bring people to tears for a woman we knew nothing about 9 months ago. When she dies it will be a crushing blow to her cancer “brothers and sisters.”

When I was diagnosed, I made a list of things I wanted to do when I got better. I have done some of them but have not been able to do as many as I would have liked, mostly because of Covid-19. I am a lifelong Dodgers fan who has never been to Opening Day at the stadium. I was all set to go in 2020. Then the season was delayed because of Covid. In 2021 attendance was sparse – also because of Covid. I am hoping to go Opening Day this season, but the owners and players stupidity saw the owners lock out the players and the odds of Opening Day happening on time are not very good. Can anyone say 2023? My goal is to get back on the basketball court and ref more games. I officiated HS Hoops for 16 years, took a pair of seasons off, did 6 games during the very short 2021 season but could not do it this season. An examination of my legs revealed my right leg is 1 CENTIMETER shorter than my left. Less than 0.4 inches. But I walk with a limp and doing games is not something I can do until it is taken care of. Hopefully it will and it is being looked at. If so - great. If not - so be it.

I also want to go back to see the amazing people on Hoag Floor 8West and thank then for all they did. This picture was taken on December 11, 2019 with some of the nurses on the night shift. I brought them pizza and cookies that day and sooooooooo want to go back and thank all of them in person but we know why that can't happen. I know one day I will and I treasure that chance. I do stay in contact with them and twice a year bring them tons of lemons from the family tree.

Luckily one of the things I wanted to do I was able to do. My youngest niece will be 15 in June. I have been taking her to Dave & Buster’s since she was 5. That happened because her sister is 18 years older than her, and her other immediate cousin is 9 years older than her. So, I was able to get her out of Chuck E Cheese and into D&B earlier than most because I took the other two and she tagged along. She loved it and we have gone a double-digit number of times. I only take her on Wednesday’s because that is “half-priced” day – the only time I can afford to take her. We went to the one at the Irvine Spectrum and after going we would walk across the way to Yogurtland and maybe even Panda Express. I took her on Wednesday, January 1, 2020, and it was awesome to do. As you can see here, she is also not the little pipsqueak she once was with the first picture being from D&B and the second one taking in March, 2013 when we went to Disneyland and this is her ready to ride Splash Mountain:

I will accomplish other items on my list. That is a guarantee. My goal is to do them before the next 1000 days passes. If it does – it does. If it doesn’t – it doesn’t. When you beat cancer, you realize you should only worry about BIG things – things you have some control over. Little things – things you have no control over? Don’t let them eat away at your time because as any cancer survivor can tell you – once you are given a rare second chance at life, spend your time enjoying it!

Julie Carr:

Nathan, Roger, Me, Norm, Hank